


Moving On

by amenokuma (orphan_account)



Series: Moving On [1]
Category: D.Gray-man
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, M/M, Sexual Content
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-10
Updated: 2013-08-08
Packaged: 2017-12-18 09:30:38
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 18,605
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/878298
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/amenokuma
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After not seeing each other for a number of years two friends attempt to resume their friendship. They hadn't planned on it turning into something more than that.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

It was cold, but as long as he could feel it that meant that he was alive.

"…right, Mana?" Allen said quietly as he wiped dirt off the marker of the Walker family gravesite. He turned his head and stood at the sound of boots crunching over snow, his eyes widening. The visitor stopped a few feet away.

"Hey."

"Kanda..."

"May I?"

"Please." Allen moved aside as Kanda walked over, an evergreen arrangement in one arm. He bent down and placed it on the newly cleaned stone. He stood up and bowed his head for a minute, then stepped back and looked at Allen.

"You've grown, sprout. Guess that's to be expected since it's been a while," a light mocking tone to his voice.

Allen smiled at the nickname. "It's been years. But how'd you know I'd be here?"

"It's the anniversary of his death, right?" Allen nodded but looked puzzled. "Tiedoll keeps tabs on all his 'sons'," Kanda said, chuckling.

"All I did was come over and hang out and eat all his food," Allen laughed, his breath visible in the chilly air. He looked up at the darkening sky, the clouds heavy with the promise of snow, and shivered.

"I'd ask if you want to go get a drink, but…"

"Can't even stand the smell of the stuff," Allen wrinkled his nose, "but at least I don't have to now I'm not living with Cross anymore."

"How about some coffee then?"

"Fine by me. They'll be closing the cemetery soon, anyway." Allen took another look at the gravestone. "Bye for now, Mana," and at Kanda, "Thanks for coming," smiling brightly.

"No problem," he shrugged, and began to walk away. "You drive?" he said as Allen fell in step beside him.

"I live close by so I walked. You?"

"My car's over there," Kanda nodded his head to the solitary car parked on the street near the entrance.

"I know a nice place if you don't mind driving."

"Whatever."

Allen grinned at the familiar nonchalance. They were almost to the road when Allen stepped on an icy patch, his foot slipping from under him. He grabbed onto the nearest thing, which happened to be Kanda's arm, and they both went down with a thud.

"The fuck!"

"Sorry!"

"Get off me, you klutz!" glaring up at Allen, their noses practically touching.

Allen scrambled to get up, but slipped again, landing on his butt. Kanda stood, brushing himself off, smirking at his friend still on the ground. He held out his hand and Allen took it, pulled up to his feet by a strong arm.

"Well then…" Allen smiled sheepishly.

"C'mon," Kanda sighed and shook his head as he let go of Allen's hand, and they made their way to the car.

 

They found a place to sit at the cozy restaurant and a waitress came over to take their order.

"Coffee still alright?" Kanda asked.

Allen nodded, "and do you have any pie?"

"Apple or cherry, hon?"

"Um…apple, please."

"Right. Two coffees and an apple pie," and she smiled before walking away.

"You were gonna get both, weren't you?"

"It's only natural to eat more in the wintertime."

"It's only natural for you to eat more anytime. You haven't changed," a wry smile on Kanda's face.

"Neither have you. Still with the attitude," Allen shot back, grinning.

The waitress brought their coffee, setting it down along with Allen's pie. He smiled up at her and said, "Thank you."

"You're welcome, hon. Let me know if you need anything else," and left to take care of another customer.

As he added creamer and multiple packets of sugar to his coffee Allen said, "Speaking of Tiedoll, how's he doing?"

"Fine. Since we're all grown now he decided to take off to paint the world," Kanda blew on the hot, black liquid before taking a few sips. "And Cross?"

"Out painting the _town_ , I expect," Allen smiled as he stirred his drink until the sugar dissolved. "How'd those two ever become friends in the first place?"

"Through their old job from what Tiedoll used to tell us."

"Well, Cross never told me anything at all. Not like I was in any position to ask. I was just grateful he gave me a place to live after Mana died. At least I didn't end up in an orphanage. He still shows up every now and then when he wants to sponge money off me. Says I owe him and that I can afford it since I'm working and all," Allen sighed as he cut into his pie with a fork. "And how's everyone else doing?"

Kanda set his cup down. "Marie's got himself a girlfriend."

"Good for him, and what about Daisya?"

"He died last year in a car accident."

Allen quickly swallowed his mouthful. "Oh…I'm sorry to hear that."

Kanda looked out the window as dark finally fell. "He was always the reckless type, anyway…" reaching for his cup to take another sip.

"Still, I liked him and he was really good at soccer. I had a lot of fun playing with him." The conversation lapsed as Allen finished off his pie. The waitress was passing by and he signaled her.

"Need refills?"

"Yes, please, and can I have a piece of cherry pie, too?"

"Sure thing, sweetie. Be right back," giving him another smile. After she left Kanda started to chuckle.

"What?"

"I think she likes you."

"She's just doing her job," Allen grumbled, drinking his coffee down. Said waitress returned with his pie and refilled both their cups, but the next table over called for refills, too, so she just gave Allen a quick nod and left.

Kanda was still chuckling to himself. "How's the session work coming?"

Allen had more pie halfway to his mouth as he looked at Kanda quizzically. "How'd you know about that?"

"Like I said, Tiedoll keeps tabs," sipping his second cup.

Allen smiled. "I'm doing pretty good at it. It's kinda like having a temp job. In fact, I'm leaving tomorrow for a studio gig. Be out of town for probably a couple of weeks. I worry about my piano when I'm gone, though. My neighborhood has really gone downhill and one of these days I'm afraid I'll come home to find it's been stolen."

"That's no good. You should move."

"I've been thinking about it. My lease is up in two months, and it's not like I have a lot of stuff, but I'm not sure where to go. Where do you live now?"

"A place close to where I work. It's bigger than I need, but it was a good deal and the building's nice."

"Sounds good. Do they have any vacancies?" Finishing his coffee Allen wiped his mouth with a napkin.

"Don't know, but I can check."

"Thanks." Allen glanced up at the wall clock. "I guess we'd better go. It's getting late and I gotta be at the airport early." He hailed the waitress and she brought the check. "I'll take care of this since you drove."

"Works for me." Kanda stood and pulled on his overcoat, Allen doing the same after leaving a decent tip on the table. Kanda waited for him at the door as he went to the register to pay.

The waitress called out from across the room, "Come see us again, hon," and Allen waved as he and Kanda walked out the door.

"Just doing her job, huh?" Kanda was chuckling again as they got in the car.

"Shut up," Allen closed the door with a little more force than he'd intended.

"Heh…so where exactly do you live?"

"Back the way we came, just a few streets down from the cemetery."

"Got it." Kanda pulled out into traffic and they drove in silence for a few minutes.

"So, you said you lived near your work. What kinda work?"

"Landscaping. It's slacked off a bit 'cause it's winter, but there's still stuff to do and the owner has a florist shop, too, so sometimes I help out there."

"You always did like to mess around with plants," Allen smiled, remembering Tiedoll's backyard garden. When they were in school everyone was older than him and he didn't see them much until after school or on weekends. He used to go over there when Cross wasn't home, which was most of the time. He liked the homey feel of the place, but it made him sad, too, because it reminded him of when he was with Mana. When they passed the cemetery he said, "Not this street, but the next one, and turn left."

Kanda turned down Allen's street, the neighborhood growing more rundown the further they got from the main road.

"It's that three-story on the right."

Kanda parked in front of the building that had definitely seen better days, looking around as he left the engine idling. "What a dump."

"Yeah. I gotta get outta here," Allen sighed, listening to the neighbors as they began their nightly shouting match.

"So…" Kanda began hesitantly, "would you like to come over and hang out sometime?"

Allen glanced over at him. Kanda was staring straight ahead, his fingers drumming on the steering wheel. "Sure, I'd like that, and I could see what your building's like, too."

"Yeah." He fished around the back seat for a moment until he found some paper. "Should be a pen in the glove compartment." Allen opened it up and pushed the car manuals around until he found it and handed it over.

Kanda scribbled on the paper and gave it to Allen. "Here's my number. Call me when you get back in town, okay?"

"Will do," stuffing the paper in his coat pocket. He climbed out of the car and leaned back in, "and thanks for the ride."

"Yeah, yeah, just get inside already before you get mugged," shooing him off.

Allen smiled, closing the door properly this time and walked up the front steps to his apartment. He turned and waved once and then disappeared inside.

 

When Kanda got home he kicked off his shoes, plopped down on the sofa and put his feet up on the coffee table. Seeing Allen again had brought back some good memories. When Tiedoll had mentioned that Allen would probably be at the graveyard today it'd lit a small spark in Kanda. He didn't like people in general. It was why he lived alone and had chosen a job that required minimal contact.

But Allen was different. He was one of the few people Kanda could call a friend. When they were younger they'd argued and fought a lot. Tiedoll had to separate them numerous times, but he liked the sass Allen gave him and he gave it right back.

Now that sass seemed diluted, maybe because they were older, but it could be because of Allen's jobs. He looked less lively than what Kanda remembered. When he'd met up with Allen he'd had no other intentions than to just see an old friend and pay his respects. He never thought he'd actually give the guy his phone number and ask him over, but after talking with him and seeing where he lived he'd felt a need to reach out to him. But it wasn't out of pity. Kanda didn't believe in pity, and he didn't think Allen would appreciate it, either.

As he sat looking around his spacious apartment an idea was forming. He didn't think there were any vacancies in the building but would check just to make sure. He had an extra bedroom and bath that was sitting empty and it was a pain to have to clean something he didn't even use. When Allen had said he wanted to move Kanda hadn't thought of himself at first but now it just seemed to make sense. It would all depend on how well they could get along. They weren't kids anymore and maybe it would work. And with their work schedules they probably wouldn't get in each other's way all that much since Allen was out of town a lot.

Allen was supposed to call him when he got back, but if he didn't hear from the sprout at least he knew where he lived now and he could just go harass him. And maybe threaten some of his neighbors just for fun. Chuckling to himself he got up and walked to his room, turning off all the lights on the way. He'd see how things went when Allen came over and make his decision then.

 

Allen sat on his bed and pulled his legs up to his chest, wrapped his arms around them and rested his head on top of his knees. As the neighborhood geared up for another crazy night the noises all around him increased. He was trying to ignore it as he thought about all that'd happened earlier.

Seeing Kanda was nice. It was more than nice. It was great. Finally someone he could talk to and not have to plaster on a fake smile, because Kanda accepted him just like he was. Someone he shared memories with and felt comfortable with…and it just felt so natural. So unlike what he'd gotten used to with his job.

He'd felt all alone and so lonely when he first began. The music industry was so superficial and not the best place to make lasting friendships. If he'd been part of a band it might have been different, and sometimes he worked with the same people when a studio liked his playing and called him back again, but that was never a given and now, after seeing Kanda tonight, the loneliness hit him doubly hard.

A loud bang down on the street made him jump. He hoped it was just a car backfiring and not a gunshot.

_When I get back I'm definitely giving Kanda a call, and even if there's no vacancies at his building maybe I could find something else if the area's nice._

He nodded his head. _Yeah, definitely,_ and jumped again when another bang went off. Groaning, he rolled over on his side and pulled earplugs out of the nightstand drawer, stuffed them in his ears and covered his head with the pillow.

_I'm gonna keep moving forward, Mana, just like you told me. I'm gonna get out of here._


	2. Chapter 2

A knock on the door and Kanda opened it to see Allen standing in the hallway holding a grocery bag.

"What's all that?"

"In case I get hungry."

"Like I don't have food. Leave your shoes here," Kanda said as he walked back inside.

"I just didn't want to eat all of yours." Allen stepped out of his shoes, pushing them to the side with his foot and followed Kanda into the apartment.

"Kitchen's there," Kanda pointed to the right.

Allen set the bag down on the counter as he looked around. "This is really nice, and you have a balcony, too?" He walked over to the sliding glass doors and opened it, a cold breeze ruffling his hair. The balcony ran the length of the living room. It had a couple of chairs and a few empty flower pots and overlooked the parking lot. Beyond that was a park blanketed in snow and a frozen over lake. "I bet the park looks pretty in spring when everything's blooming," he said as Kanda sat down on the sofa.

"It does, and close the door, dummy. You're letting all the heat out."

Allen slid the door closed and walked over to the kitchen. "Mind if I use your fridge?"

"Be my guest, if you can find any room."

Allen was sorting through the bag, putting a few things in the freezer, when he said, "When I called to get directions I was lucky to catch you here. You only gave me your home number. You should give me your cell number, too."

"Don't have one."

"You're kidding." Allen looked incredulous. "Why not?"

"Don't need one. Anyone wants to get ahold of me they can leave a message if I'm not here."

"But…"

"Why would I wanna make it easier for people to annoy me?"

"You're too much," Allen shook his head as he walked over to the sofa and sat down. "So, what do you wanna do today? It's pretty nice out right now. We could go somewhere."

"Like where?"

"I don't know, maybe a movie?"

"Too expensive."

"We could go to the matinee."

"Everyone goes to the matinee 'cause it's cheaper. Too many people."

"We could try an older show. Maybe not as full."

"Still no."

"And why exactly not?" Allen was getting exasperated.

"There's shit on the seats."

Allen stared at Kanda for a moment before he could even answer. "You're making that up."

"Am not. I saw a news report about it. Independent labs took swabs checking for cleanliness in the theaters and found fecal matter. Seems people were too lazy to wash their hands when they went to the restroom."

Allen waved his hands, "Fine, fine, I get it already. That's too much information. Let's just stay here and watch TV." He grabbed the remote and pointed it at the flat screen, clicking through the channels. "There's a Star Wars marathon on."

"There's always a Star Wars marathon on."

"Hmm, kung fu theater. Those are always fun."

"I don't like the newer ones. The action looks fake with all the wire work. The older ones are better 'cause the guys are beating the shit outta each other for real."

"You don't like much, do you? Ever consider therapy?" Allen teased him with a smirk.

"Don't push it, sprout. I could still take you."

"I doubt that."

"From what I remember you were pretty much a wimp."

"Then you have a faulty memory."

"You're asking for it."

"Wouldn't wanna get you thrown out of your nice place."

"Jealous much?"

"What's there to be jealous of? I'd rather listen to my neighbors than your bitching any day."

They glared at each other for a full minute before they both took a deep breath.

"Why don't I make some popcorn?" Allen suggested, breaking the silence.

"Fine." Kanda snatched the remote from Allen and continued to scroll through the stations.

"You got anything to drink?" Allen rummaged through the bag and pulled out a box of popcorn. Taking one of the packages out he put it in the microwave and pressed the button to get it going.

"There's some iced tea left, I think."

"No soda?"

"You know I don't like that sweet shit," Kanda groused.

"Another thing you don't like." When Kanda raised an eyebrow Allen held his hands up defensively. "Okay! Iced tea sounds good," and Allen opened the fridge to look for it while the microwave whirred, making popping sounds.

 

Allen brought out a big bowl of popcorn and the tea, putting the drinks on the table and the bowl between them on the sofa as he sat down. "So, what's on?"

"Not much, as usual." Kanda kept pressing the remote as Allen began to munch.

"Wait, go back a few. No, not there, back again. Yeah, that."

"Pirates, huh?"

"Yeah, and no arguing. I'm the guest, and a good host is supposed to do what his guest wants."

"Yeah, yeah," Kanda sank into the sofa and put his feet up.

"Mind if I put my feet up, too?"

"You're the guest. Do whatever the hell you want," Kanda muttered as he took some popcorn for himself.

"Thanks, I will," Allen smiled triumphantly and stretched his legs out on the coffee table.

They watched in silence for a while, Allen eating most of the popcorn. Kanda seemed to have lost interest in it as the movie went on.

"What the fuck's his deal? Just whose side is he on?"

"They just said that, Kanda, and it's obvious he's got a plan in mind," Allen chided him.

"…and what's with all the flailing around? He looks like a moron. I don't trust him. He's like a con artist and probably cheats at cards, too, just like you," Kanda smirked.

"That was never proven. You're just pissed 'cause you never won a game," Allen grinned.

"Jerk."

Allen made more popcorn and finished that off, went through two whole bags of chips, a container of dip and more iced tea. He was currently working on his fourth popsicle when he heard Kanda snort.

"You just laughed."

"I did not, but he's definitely a moron. After all that he falls off the building."

"But he turned out to be a pretty good guy in the end so your argument is invalid."

"Didn't know we were arguing."

"We're always arguing."

Kanda sighed. Maybe this wouldn't work. "Now _I'm_ hungry. Think I'll make some stir-fry."

Allen sucked the last bit off the popsicle stick. "Yum…you'd cook for me?"

"I cook for _me,_ and maybe you, too, if you don't give me anymore shit," chuckling as he picked up the bowl and glasses. Allen crumpled the chip bags and got up to trail after Kanda into the kitchen.

"Just lemme know what I can do to help," and they set about making dinner.

 

As they were eating Kanda said," So, you've been living here for almost a year now?"

"Mmhm…" Allen hastily chewed and swallowed his food. "I moved back to be close to Mana."

"How come you never went to visit Tiedoll? He would've liked to see you. He _was_ keeping track of you, after all."

"Well, I was here, but not here, if you know what I mean, but you're right. I should've paid him a visit. Now I feel bad 'cause he's not here." Allen sighed. "If you talk to him could you at least tell him Hi for me and that I'm sorry?"

"I'm not a messenger service," Kanda muttered, "but next time I hear from him I'll tell him what you said."

While Allen was helping Kanda clean up after dinner, putting the last of the dishes away, Kanda's mind was running in circles. It'd been too easy for them to fall back into bad habits. If they had more time to get used to each other before Allen moved in maybe things would work out, but it didn't help that he was constantly out of town, and Allen didn't have a whole lot of time. He needed to be out of his place in less than two months. His train of thought was interrupted when Allen said, "I'm thinking of putting my piano in storage."

"Wouldn't that affect it even if the place was climate controlled?"

"It might, but at least it'd have a place even if I didn't. Did you check on vacancies here?"

"There aren't any, but maybe something will open up soon. You never know." Kanda pursed his lips, making a decision. "Look, why don't you just store it here."

Allen leaned back against the counter, clearly not expecting this. "Are you sure?"

"Yeah, it's not like I don't have room for it. You could put it in the spare bedroom and it'd be safe when you're out of town. Just how big is this thing, anyway?"

"It's a portable so it doesn't take up much room. This would really help a lot. Thank you, Kanda," his smiling face expressing his relief.

Kanda cleared his throat, "So, did you drive?"

"I took the bus. Didn't bother buying a car 'cause I'm not here that much and it'd just be broken into or stolen."

"Idiot. I could've come to pick you up. Would it fit in my car?"

"Easily."

"Then let's go get it now."

"Okay!"

When they finally got it set up in the second bedroom Allen was oozing happiness as he sat in one of the two chairs that were the only pieces of furniture in the room, other than a nightstand.

"It's nice," Kanda was nodding his head in approval, sitting in the other chair, "and here's a key so you can come and play it anytime you want," dropping it into Allen's outstretched hand.

Allen looked at that key like it was the best thing he'd ever seen. "Oh, I've got headphones, too, so I won't disturb your neighbors."

"Don't worry about that. The walls are pretty thick in this place. So let's hear something."

"It's the least I can do for all your help." Allen got up and settled himself on the stool in front of the piano and took a moment before he began to play.

Kanda closed his eyes as a sweet melody filled the air. _I could get used to this,_ inwardly sighing as Allen played on. A good twenty minutes later Allen stopped and twirled around on the stool to face Kanda. "Sorry, I just get carried away when I'm playing. So, what do you think?" hoping for the best.

"It was okay."

Allen was familiar enough with Kanda's talent for understatement to know that meant he really liked it. Looking at his watch he saw how late it was getting. "Whoa, I guess I should go if I wanna catch the last bus."

"I'll give you a lift."

"But we just came from there…"

"It's not a problem, so just get your shoes on, already." Allen was a damn good musician and Kanda was actually looking forward to hearing more, but he'd never tell him as much. Having the piano here now was as good as Allen moving in. It was the next logical step, but he'd wait a little to see if Allen found anything else.

Allen was humming to himself as they were getting shoes and coats on. It was going to feel a little weird not having the piano with him but he could still play it whenever he wanted. That Kanda trusted him enough to give him a key to his home meant a lot. It was coming down to the wire and he'd need to make a serious effort to find a new place, wishing for a brief moment that Kanda would ask him to live here. It would be nice to live with someone he knew and trusted, but that was totally up to Kanda and Allen didn't feel right bringing it up himself.

"You ready?" Kanda asked, opening the door.

"Yup."

Kanda walked outside and Allen followed along, closing the door behind him. The neighbors could do their worst tonight and Allen wouldn't even notice because his piano was safe and sound. Now he just needed to find a nice place for both of them.


	3. Chapter 3

Kanda was stomping up the staircase on his way home, deciding against the elevator so he could work off some of his aggravation. The florist shop had been super busy all day and he was in a foul mood because of it.

Stupid Valentine's Day and all the stupid ass people wanting flowers to express their love on some stupid ass manufactured holiday. God, it was enough to make him want to puke. The closest he'd come to experiencing what could pass for love was his adoptive father's stupid ass gushing over his 'sons' and it was not an emotion he wanted anything to do with. It just made people even more stupid than they already were.

He was looking forward to a quiet evening at home so it came as a surprise when he opened the door to his apartment to hear the sounds of the piano. Why was Allen here now? The sprout wasn't supposed to be back until this weekend. He removed his shoes and walked to the bedroom, stopping in the doorway a moment before quietly taking a seat, letting Allen finish the piece before speaking.

Bringing the melancholy song to an end Allen sighed, and jumped when Kanda cleared his throat.

"When did you get home?"

"Just now, but what're you doing back so soon?"

"Finished up early. They didn't need me anymore," and there was something in the way Allen said that which made Kanda uneasy.

"Nice song."

"Did you really like it? It's something I wrote, and I have a lot of others, too," beginning to sound a little more cheerful.

"You should just chuck the jobs and go solo. Put out your own stuff."

"Easier said than done. Maybe some day…" his voice trailed off. "You look tired. Had a rough day?"

"Talk about it later," Kanda grumbled, not wanting his irritation to resurface now that it had started to fade. Getting that uneasy vibe from Allen wasn't helping, either, so Kanda figured now was as good a time as any to bring up what he'd been thinking, and it might help take a load off Allen's mind, too. "You know, you're here so much you might as well just move in."

Allen opened and closed his mouth several times, having trouble getting the words out. "Are you serious?"

"Yeah, I've been thinking about it for a while now and you have less than two weeks till you have to vacate. You haven't found anything else, right?"

"I've been looking, but there's nothing in the nicer areas I can afford."

"Well, it'll just make it easier on both of us then, splitting the rent. I'm sure it's probably less than what you're currently paying to live in that hell hole."

"Kanda…I don't know what to say."

"You're supposed to say yes, dumbass," Kanda chuckled at Allen's stupefied expression.

This was just what Allen needed to bring him out of his mood. "Yes! Thank you, Kanda," with a big smile.

"You said you don't have much stuff, probably not even a bed." Allen shook his head. "Guess we'll have to go shopping...unless you wanna sleep on the floor," he said with a small chuckle. "We could go tomorrow. The boss gave me the day off 'cause I worked so long today."

"I have plenty of time now so I can move right away," Allen was feeling so happy he thought he might burst, but the good feeling left just as quick as it came, and Kanda picked up on it.

"Did something happen?"

"Some problems on the last job."

"It shows. That song you were playing sounded kinda sad. How long have you been in the business, anyway?"

"After you guys graduated and left me behind Cross dragged me off on one of his whims. We traveled everywhere, but at least he let me stay in one place long enough to graduate from high school. I was in the music program and the teacher said I had talent. She knew people and introduced me to them and they liked how I played and it just went from there. I've been working ever since and had a pretty good reputation going."

_"Had?"_

"…until this last job," Allen offered reluctantly.

"C'mon. Spill."

"The guy said he had more work that I'd be perfect for, but there were…conditions."

"Which were?" That hesitancy again, and Kanda began to get the picture. "What did he want?"

"Wanted to blow me," Allen said quietly and looked down at his feet.

"And you turned him down," Kanda added, equally quiet.

"Yeah...and he got all red in the face and told me I was through. Normally, I could care less but he's pretty influential in the industry and if he wants to be an ass about it he could blacklist me. If that happens I won't be working much."

Kanda shook his head in disbelief. "Has this happened before?"

"People said things, just joking around. Well, maybe half joking, but it was never a big deal and I haven't had a problem like this before."

"That's fucked up. I could always go mess the guy up a bit."

"Ah, that...would just make things worse, and I don't even know if it'll be a problem at all," _even though I have a feeling it probably will be._

Kanda merely shrugged.

"Guess I'll find out who my real friends are, if I can even call them that. More like acquaintances. Maybe someone will still be willing to give me work, but my income might be a little iffy from now on."

"Don't you have any savings?"

"Some, but I'd hate to dig into it if I don't have to." Allen sighed again. "Of course this had to happen right when something _good_ finally happens to me."

"I could probably get you a job at the florist. I'll be going back to landscaping when spring hits and he'll be looking for help."

"Guess I'll see how things go first." Allen looked past Kanda, staring at nothing in particular. "You know, it's funny. I've never really thought of myself as attractive, but I guess other people see me differently."

"Well, you're not ugly."

"Thanks...I think," he smiled, only to have his expression quickly change to a frown, "…though I wish people like _that guy_ would see _nothing_ in me at all. I've met some nice girls that seemed genuinely interested, but they wanted more than just friendship and I never felt that way about them. One girl even asked me out, but I was honest with her when I turned her down. She was cool about it and said she hoped I'd find a nice boyfriend someday."

"So you like guys?"

"Don't know. Never met one I was attracted to." Allen smiled a little when he glanced at Kanda. "What about you? You're a good looking guy. Thought you'd have someone by now."

"Tch…as if I'd want all that hassle. Tried to do the club scene...with _Daisya_ of all people." He rolled his eyes. "It was more fun watching everyone make asses of themselves. Idiots going out of their way, trying to impress. Reminded me of why I can't stand people in the first place, and today was ridiculous. Customers emoting all over me, acting all love struck and stupid."

"Oh, that's right, it's Valentine's Day. So that's what got your panties in a bunch."

"I don't wear panties," Kanda glared at him.

"No? How about boxers, then?" Kanda stood up and started moving towards Allen. "Briefs, maybe?" chuckling despite impending doom approaching him.

Kanda stopped, changed his mind and quickly turned on his heel. "I'm gonna make dinner," he growled. "Are you gonna help or just sit on your ass grinning like a hyena?"

Allen walked after him into the kitchen as Kanda began digging through the fridge. "We have ice cream, too."

"Why don't you ever buy anything I like?" narrowing his eyes at Allen.

"I would if you'd tell me what you like, instead of everything you _don't_ like."

Kanda gave up on the fridge and opened the cabinets. "Fuck it, I'll just make soba."

Allen wisely said no more and got out the pot to boil the noodles.

  

As Kanda expertly guided the soba to his mouth Allen continued to struggle with his chopsticks. He was getting better with them, though, because it seemed every other meal he ate here _was_ soba.

Halfway through dinner he put them down, giving his aching fingers a break. Kanda looked smug, fully aware of his predicament.

Seemingly out of the blue Allen said, "Do you think it's strange a guy in his twenties hasn't had sex?"

Kanda almost spit out his noodles. He put his chopsticks down and stared at Allen for a moment. "Uh…not really, I guess. I mean, if there's no one you like there's no need to force yourself. Don't really need anyone, anyway. I take care of my own 'needs' just fine."

"So you get horny?"

Kanda coughed out a laugh. "I _am human_ , contrary to popular belief. Don't you?"

"Sure I do. I'm human, too," he stated indignantly. Allen picked up the chopsticks again, making another stab at his food and Kanda resumed eating, chuckling his way through the rest of dinner.

 

"You might as well stay here tonight. You can sleep on the sofa and we can go get you a bed tomorrow. No sense going back to your place, unless there's something you need."

"Nothing I can think of. I'll probably sleep better here than I would there, anyway."

"I've got a spare pillow and some blankets you can use," Kanda said as he got up from the table, heading to the hall closet near his own bedroom. He pulled the accordion doors open, grabbed the bedding and dumped it in Allen's arms.

"Wow, you've got a washer/dryer, too? I won't have to go to the laundromat anymore," clearly thrilled about this unexpected bonus.

"Heh…makes life a little easier, right? I'm gonna turn in now 'cause I'm dead tired. I'll see you in the morning," walking towards his room.

"Okay. Goodnight, and…" Kanda paused at his doorway, looking back at Allen, "...thanks again, Kanda."

"…sure." Quickly turning away, he went inside and closed the door behind him.

After turning out the lights Allen stretched out on the sofa. So much had happened today he was still a bit wound up and was having some trouble falling asleep. It was so quiet here compared to his place it was almost unnerving, but as time ticked by he gradually relaxed and snuggled into the blankets, his breathing becoming slow and steady on this first night in his new home.


	4. Chapter 4

They took their time getting up in the morning. After they ate the first order of business was to find Allen some furniture, so they set off to the nearest store. Kanda said Allen could keep the chairs and nightstand if he wanted them so Allen walked around the showroom, checking out the beds, bouncing on each one in turn. Kanda chuckled at the childlike display and Allen decided on a full size which his current sheets would fit. He also purchased a dresser and was told they'd be delivered the following day. It meant he'd have to sleep on the sofa one more night, but he didn't mind that at all. Last night's sleep was the best he'd had in a long time.

Then they took off for Allen's place. When Kanda entered the small apartment he looked around in dismay. It'd been night when he'd first come here to get the piano, but seeing it in daylight made its flaws stand out even more with its worn out floorboards and yellowed walls. It wouldn't take too much to fix the place up a bit, but it was obvious that maintenance didn't give a shit.

Allen was in the closet pulling out boxes that he'd broken down when he first moved there, piling them in the middle of the floor. He dug through the closet again before looking through the drawers and cabinets in the kitchen, finally finding a roll of duct tape, and they started putting the boxes back together. When the boxes were ready Allen began packing his sparse belongings, some of which were notebooks full of musical scores he'd written. As Allen was working on filling the boxes Kanda was emptying the closet, laying the clothes out on the bed.

Hearing noises outside, Kanda walked to the window and looked down at the street. A few people were milling around, staring at his car with interest. "Looks like we've attracted some pests."

Allen looked up from his place on the floor where he was taping up one of the boxes. "I've got this. You'd better go defend your territory," he said with a knowing grin. The neighbors would be on the receiving end of Kanda's ire and Allen didn't feel sorry for them in the least.

Kanda took the stairs two at a time and threw open the front door. "Who the _fuck_ said you could touch my car?!" catching them in the act of leaning against it. They scrambled across the street, yelling obscenities back at him, but he glared them into silence and they skulked off.

Allen brought the first box down and Kanda opened the trunk. They took turns loading it up, one standing guard while the other left to get more until the car was packed. Allen put his clothes, still on the hangers, on top of the boxes in the back seat and shut the door.

"There's still one more box and I've gotta return the key. Be right back." Kanda nodded and got in the driver's side, glancing around the neighborhood for any possible reprisals.

Allen did one more walk-through, checking the whole apartment, and when he was satisfied he'd gotten everything he picked up the last of his stuff and locked up. Walking down to the first floor he knocked on the landlord's door, only to have it creak open to the touch.

"Hello?" he called out as he entered. He heard the TV from the other room and walked further in, his stomach turning at the smell of booze that permeated the place. He found the man slumped in a chair, sound asleep with an empty beer bottle hanging loosely from his hand. Allen shook his head and walked into the kitchen, pulling out a note he'd written to let the man know he'd vacated the place. He left it on the table with the key on top of it and quickly left, closing the door firmly. Then he was out the front and down the steps. He climbed into the passenger seat and held the box on his lap.

"All set?" Kanda asked. Allen nodded and Kanda started up the engine, pulling out from the curb and they were away.

Moving Allen in was easy in comparison. Kanda borrowed a hand trolley from building maintenance and they stacked the boxes on it. It only took a few trips up and down the elevator until they had everything in Allen's room.

"Glad that's done. I'm starving! Let's get take-out. I'll pay. How about pizza?"

"Ugh. Too rich."

"Chinese, then?"

Kanda thought about it and nodded. "I could do that, and I know just the place."

 

Kanda was using chopsticks again but Allen chose a fork instead, shoveling generous portions in his mouth.

"You moved out ahead of time. Are they gonna reimburse you for the last two weeks?"

"Pfft…don't make me laugh, and I'm just happy to be out of there. When I moved in they didn't ask for first and last or a security deposit, which would've been a joke, anyway. I just paid month to month and the landlord never kept any records. He probably won't even notice I'm gone," Allen said, suppressing a belch.

"But you might need whatever money you can get. You don't know what's gonna happen with your work."

"Yeah, I know, but it's not really worth it. I left him a note with my new address in case he wants to send it, but he isn't coherent half the time and there's no way I'm ever going back there. Last night I was thinking of giving myself six months to see how the work pans out. That's about as much as I want to dip into my savings, and if nothing happens then I'll just find myself a job, maybe part time so I can keep working on the music."

Kanda shrugged, wiping his mouth with a napkin. "It's up to you, but in the meantime, if you do decide you want to work, I can probably still get you something at the florist."

"Thanks." Allen sniffed at his clothes. "I really need a shower. Haven't had one in days," he said getting up from the table.

"Starting to get a little ripe, are we?" Kanda smirked and began clearing the table.

"Mmhm…" Allen hummed as he went to his room to get a change of clothes. _Oh…that's right. This is my room now,_ and a big grin spread across his face. He ran his hand over his piano and said softly, "I finally found us a nice place," then went off to _his_ bathroom feeling a little giddy.

 

Kanda was off to work early the next day and Allen had the place all to himself. His furniture arrived and he spent the rest of the morning and part of the afternoon emptying boxes, arranging things to his liking, and doing laundry. Standing in his room with his hands on his hips he nodded with satisfaction at the results.

He left for a while to get some fresh air and walked the neighborhood. He stopped by the park first and went down to the lake. There were warning signs posted to the effect that the ice was thinning and that it wasn't safe for skating anymore. There weren't many people in the park right then, just a mother taking her baby out in a stroller and an elderly couple walking slowly along, hand in hand. The sight warmed his heart and he remembered the first time he visited Kanda as he looked out at the park from the balcony. Now he'd be here to watch the trees bloom in the springtime. With this happy thought there was a bounce to his step as he left to check out the stores nearby.

He found a nice bakery and home-style restaurant and brought back dinner, deciding to eat his right away. He had no idea when Kanda would be home because he'd left while Allen was still asleep. Putting Kanda's portion in the fridge he left a note on the counter, took another shower and flopped down on top of his bed. He hadn't allowed himself to think about his work all day, needing to take a break from worrying about his future, and now that he was lying down he closed his eyes for a brief nap.

 

Kanda was tired by the time he got home. He'd worked at both jobs; a few hours at the florist and the rest at the landscaping business. They were readying themselves for spring and were taking inventory of the warehouse to make sure they were well supplied for the inevitable increase in the work load. Leaving his shoes and coat by the door he flipped the switch in the kitchen, glancing around the place. He didn't hear any sounds coming from Allen's room but he could still be in there busy with other things, seeing as how his furniture was supposed to be delivered that day. _Probably sorting out his stuff._ Kanda noticed the note on the counter.

"Dinner's in the fridge. I already ate. Hope you _like_ it!"

"Smart ass…" he muttered as he opened the refrigerator. It was from that restaurant down the street and not something he would've ordered, but he was tired and all he had to do was heat it up. "…whatever," and put it in the microwave.

He sat on the sofa and ate while he watched the news, the food turning out to be more to his liking than he'd care to admit. Flipping through the stations when the news was over he found a movie that looked interesting so he got up and went to Allen's room. The door was ajar and the light was still on and he stuck his head in.

"Hey, there's a movie on. You wanna watch it with…" Allen was passed out on the bed with a big smile on his face. Kanda went in and had a good look around. Allen had been busy alright. Everything was put away, and it was kind of nice to see the room looking lived in for once. He glanced over at Allen, sprawled out on the bed.

"Tch…stupid sprout, you'll catch cold sleeping like that." Kanda shook out one of the blankets and threw it on top of Allen, turning off the light and closing the door quietly when he left. Back in the living room he picked up the remote and dialed down the volume, deciding to watch the movie by himself anyway.

When the movie was over he switched to check the weather. Looked like it'd be warming up soon...and right then Allen walked in the room, the blanket draped over his shoulders and dragging behind him on the floor. One hand was holding onto the blanket while the other was rubbing the sleep out of his eyes.

"Mm…Kanda, when'd you get home?" Allen sat down on the sofa and curled his legs under him, pulling the blanket up off the floor.

"Hours ago."

"Why didn't you wake me?" Allen turned to face him and rested his head against the sofa back.

"Tried to, but you were sound asleep, snoring up a storm."

Allen frowned at him. "I do _not_ snore."

Kanda chuckled. "Could've fooled me."

"Hmph…makin' things up again. Did'ja eat dinner?"

"Yeah…thanks."

"Glad you liked it," Allen gave him a little smile.

"Didn't say I liked it. Said thanks, that's all."

Pouting a bit Allen said, "So you _didn't_ like it?"

"It was okay."

And the smile was back. "What'cha watching?"

"I was watching a movie, but it's over now."

"Why didn't 'cha wake me?"

"We already went there," a smirk tugging at his lips. "You're half-asleep. Go back to bed."

"…m'kay," and Allen sank down into the sofa.

"Not _here,_ idiot. You have a bed now."

"I know. S'great. Did'ja see it?"

"You…just go to bed."

"…'kay," Allen smiled as he unfolded himself and got up, almost tripping on the blanket wound around his legs. Kanda was shaking his head, watching Allen make his way back to his room. He picked up the remote and turned off the TV and the lights as he went to his room, chuckling all the while.

Living with Allen was going to be interesting.


	5. Chapter 5

The way people see and feel about one another can change from day to day, and once they notice the difference there's no going back to the way things used to be.

 

Kanda was back to landscaping full time as winter bled into spring. There was a lot of clean up work because of the thaw and he was busier than ever. Allen didn't see him until evening most days. As for Allen, he was holding out hope for some studio work, but the offers had slacked off considerably. Trying not to let it get to him he decided to pursue other avenues, taking Kanda's suggestion to heart about going solo. He put together a demo and sent it out to people he hadn't worked with before and also various companies to see about doing background music for TV shows or movies. There were still some people willing to employ him for backup sessions but he found himself becoming dissatisfied with the piecemeal work. Composing his own music had always been a source of comfort for him, and now that he had lots of free time on his hands he put all of his energies into doing just that.

As the weeks gradually turned into months Allen and Kanda found themselves noticing things about each other that they never would have otherwise. Actually living with someone was certainly different than just visiting occasionally. Sure, they were familiar enough with each other's personalities and quirks, but a lot of that was from their childhood and they were older now and had changed somewhat.

There were a few times when Allen _did_ get work and was out of town for a while. Kanda would come home to a dark apartment and something felt off about that.

_Oh, that's right…the lights were always on when Allen was here._

When Kanda made dinner he'd gotten so used to making larger portions that there were a lot of leftovers. He didn't like leftovers. Food was best when eaten fresh, but he didn't believe in wasting food either, so the pile up of containers in the freezer irritated him no end. So, he scaled back the amount of ingredients he used, and just when he was getting used to _that_ Allen would come home, and he'd have to adjust back to the way he was cooking before.

_If Allen was here he wouldn't have to go through all that._

Allen seemed so happy to be home that Kanda tried not to vent his irritation on the sprout, and he found _that_ to be disturbing. He'd always taken pleasure picking on Allen, but seeing that warm smile seemed more important now than his cooking issues. None of the food was wasted, of course, because Allen cleaned out the fridge in no time.

"You really _are_ a bottomless pit," Kanda said as Allen slurped up his soba. "You just ate a few hours ago, and now this."

"Can't help it. It's hard to find decent food when you're traveling. Even the leftovers were good, but it's much better when it's fresh like this," echoing Kanda's sentiments exactly.

 _Hmph, this guy_ "…well, at least you've gotten better with the chopsticks."

"I've had a lot of practice," Allen said with a sly smile, "and I don't have anything else lined up now so I can help with the meals again."

"You getting tired of my cooking?"

"Not at all, just want to do my fair share if only you'd stop hogging the kitchen."

"Hope you got paid well 'cause our food budget always goes out the window when you cook."

Kanda sighed. He put his elbow on the table and rested his cheek in his hand. Allen started eating again and Kanda found his interest drawn to Allen's hands, working the chopsticks; those fingers that played such beautiful music. He idly wondered where that music came from.

_From his head, obviously. But that's not right, it must be from his heart._

Because Kanda could always tell how Allen was feeling when he listened to him play. His emotions came through loud and clear.

_His heart must be just as…no. Stop. Why the fuck am I thinking about this guy's heart? He distracts me whether he's here or not. Guess this is what happens when you live with someone, huh?_

Not that he'd know, because the only people he'd lived with were Tiedoll and his group, and he'd spent most of his time there just trying to ignore them.

Allen finished up his bowl with a sigh of contentment. Noticing Kanda staring at him he said, "Something on your mind?"

"Nope. Just waiting for you to finish so I can clean up."

"I appreciate you sitting with me, but how come you didn't eat, too?"

"I already ate with you earlier, remember? Unlike you, I don't need to eat _ten times_ a day."

Allen chuckled. "Not listening…"

"You know what? I'll let you have the honor of washing up. I'm gonna go take a shower." Getting up from the table Kanda pushed his chair back under and made for his bedroom.

"I was gonna do it anyway," Allen called after him, "and thanks for the meal."

"Yeah, yeah…" Kanda waved without looking back and went in his room.

 

Allen was devoting most of his time now to working on his compositions, but as he did his thoughts kept straying to Kanda. This had been happening a lot lately and it was probably just a normal thing when you lived with someone for them to be foremost on your mind. He had nothing to compare his present situation with because when he was living with Mana he was very young and it had only been for a brief time. Cross was never home when he'd lived there, and when he started working he lived alone, so this living with someone was all very new to him, and Allen began to see Kanda in a new light.

There were aspects of Kanda that hadn't changed at all. His blunt way of speaking and the way he treated Allen from when they were kids were pretty much the same. He'd mellowed a little, since they hadn't gotten into any fist fights like they used to, but that remark about roughing that bastard up that'd propositioned him made him recall an incident from when they were in school.

Allen was always picked on in school because of his unusual looks. He had scars from the accident that took Mana from him and his hair had changed color from the shock. Add in the fact that he was shorter than average at the time and he became a ripe candidate for bullying. But he refused to take any shit from the kids and had fought back. Unfortunately, there were only so many he could take on by himself and he ended up looking worse than they did.

He'd patch himself up the best he could, but this one time he wasn't able to hide the damage. Feeling down, he went to Tiedoll's anyway just for the company, covered in bruises and sporting a black eye. Tiedoll had a fit, fussing over him, and Kanda was muttering things like "just who the hell do they think they are" and "I'm the only one allowed to beat up the sprout". Allen felt better when he heard him say that, because even if they got into a lot of fights themselves, he knew Kanda considered him a friend and that he also had a strong sense of justice. From that day onward Allen was never bothered at school again. They never spoke of it, but Allen knew that Kanda had probably threatened payback if those kids ever infringed on his territory again.

Kanda was still Kanda, and old habits die hard, but when someone lives by themselves it was only natural to develop new habits. Kanda had taken up reading, mostly books about plants and how to care for them, but he liked to read other things as well.

He never bought anything, though, just checked books out of the library because, "Why would I pay for something I can get for free? And it keeps the clutter to a minimum."

Kanda would sit out on the balcony when the weather warmed in the spring, just reading. Allen liked this quiet side to Kanda he'd never seen before and would leave him alone most of the time when he was like that, but sometimes he'd join him there. Kanda never complained, and Allen would look out at the park at all the trees in full bloom, happy that he was finally getting to see it.

Other times, later in the evening, Kanda would watch TV and Allen would work on his compositions in his room. When his inspiration would wane he'd come out and talk with Kanda about nothing in particular, commenting on the news or a stupid movie. They'd start their usual bickering, but then things would quiet down, neither of them saying much, actually getting along instead of constantly being at each other's throats.

 _This feels kinda nice,_ Allen thought on more than one occasion, not realizing that Kanda was thinking the same thing, too.

 

When Allen began having problems with his cell phone he'd asked Kanda if it would be alright for him to give out Kanda's home phone number to a couple of people he wanted to keep in touch with for possible work, and Kanda had voiced no objection.

So one day when the home phone rang Allen came out of his room to answer, but Kanda had beaten him to it. Apparently it wasn't for him because Kanda just waved him off, but Allen just stood there, staring.

The man was fresh out of the shower, wearing nothing but a towel. Now, Kanda had always been in good shape, but Allen was, too, so it wasn't as if he was envious or anything. It was just lately he'd caught himself looking at Kanda…a lot. He _liked_ looking at Kanda…and he was getting confused. Was this a normal way to be thinking about his friend?

Seeing Allen still standing there, Kanda mouthed a silent "What?", and Allen excused himself and started back to his room. Kanda finished the call and hung up, watching Allen walk away. Allen's hair was getting longer and sometimes he would pull it back in a ponytail, but today it was down and Kanda thought it looked better that way. But the ponytail was nice, too, when a few wisps would fall out of it and...

_Huh…sprout's been staring a lot lately…but I've been doing my fair share, too._

He shook his head and went back to his room to get dressed.

Back in his room Allen was sitting on the bed, unable to concentrate on his music. This was getting to the point where it was almost embarrassing. He had no idea why Kanda hadn't complained about his constant staring, but Allen figured his fascination with looking at Kanda would calm down with time.

_It's just because this is still new to me, living with Kanda. Yeah, it'll even out._

But that didn't happen. In fact just the opposite occurred, as feelings deepened and confusion reigned in their minds as they tried to figure out just what they were to each other now.


	6. Chapter 6

As Kanda rode the elevator he was thinking about food since it was his turn to fix dinner that night. He hadn't stopped by the store on his way home because he'd worked overtime and it was too much of a pain. By the time he let himself into the apartment he still hadn't a clue what to make, so he left his shoes and keys by the door and walked back to Allen's room to ask, half dreading the answer he'd get. He raised his hand to knock but stopped himself, hearing Allen talking on his phone. Kanda wasn't one to eavesdrop, but from what he could tell Allen wasn't having the best of conversations.

"Yes, I understand what you're saying, Anita, but I can't afford to pay for a manager right now." A brief silence. "You're probably right, I can't afford to _not_  have a manager, either. I'll keep it in mind, and thanks again for all your efforts. Maybe the next one will work out." Another silence. "Okay, talk to you later."

Kanda heard Allen sigh and then he began playing the piano. It was a slow, somber piece. _Shit, he got another rejection._ He knocked on the door, determined not to let it get to him.

"Come in."

Allen continued playing as Kanda entered the room and sat on the bed behind him. "Any thoughts on dinner?"

"…not really hungry right now."

 _Figured as much._ "Mind if I listen?"

"Suit yourself."

 _Yup, he's depressed._ Allen hadn't looked at Kanda once since he'd walked in, just kept on playing, Allen's pain evident in every note. Kanda liked to close his eyes when he listened to Allen play, but this time they were locked onto the pianist in front of him. When Allen played the piano he used his whole body, swaying in time to the tune, his head dipping down and then lifting up, his hair falling back off his shoulders. That hair looked paler than usual, reflecting Allen's mood perhaps, and without thinking about it Kanda reached out his hand to touch it, taking a few strands between his fingers. _It's soft._

Allen froze, his fingers hovering over the keys. "Do you like it?" his voice barely audible.

Kanda jerked his hand back. "Huh?"

"The music. Do you like it?"

"Oh…yeah, it's okay," face flushing slightly, glad that Allen wasn't looking his way.

Allen chuckled a little and continued on with the song.

"…I guess I'll get a shower then. Come out when you're ready to eat." Kanda got up and walked to the door, waiting for Allen's reply, but when none came he shrugged and closed the door behind him.

 

After Kanda finished his shower he took his comb with him as he walked into an empty living room, intending to comb his hair as he watched the news. He sat on the sofa and turned on the TV, but the news was already over so he turned it off and began combing his hair while he waited for Allen. Allen joined him not long after, having worked out his disappointment at losing another job. He was smiling as he sat next to Kanda, watching him.

"Doesn't it get in your way at work?"

"I'm used to it. I just pull it up, and sometimes if it gets too hot out I'll braid it," running the comb through the ends first, gradually working more into it.

 _Wonder what it feels like?_ Allen mused. _He'd probably kill me if I touched it,_ but it was only fair. Kanda _had_ just touched _his_ hair after all, hesitantly putting his hand out.

Kanda stopped combing, staring at Allen's hand, then at Allen's eyes which were watching him carefully. _He wants to touch it, huh? I guess it wouldn't hurt,_ feeling a pang of guilt because _he'd_ just done the same thing, and he nodded.

Allen took this as a yes and began to run his fingers through Kanda's hair. _It's thick, yet soft,_ stopping when he reached a snag. He took the comb from Kanda and carefully combed that out, and Kanda turned his back to Allen, letting him continue.

 _Hmm…this feels nice._ Now he could understand why people liked to go to the hair salons, not that he'd ever bothered with the places, but it did feel nice having someone work on your hair. It was kind of relaxing.

Allen continued running the comb through Kanda's hair, now working from the top down. He liked touching Kanda as much as he liked looking at him. _Damn, I'm almost finished. Maybe I could drag it out a bit,_ slowing his movements.

As comfortable as Kanda was with this treatment, when Allen slowed down he began to get a little uncomfortable, because it was feeling a little _too nice_ and he turned around and reached for the comb.

But Allen wasn't ready to relinquish it, and he was feeling a little feisty, so he jumped up off the sofa out of the way of Kanda's grasp.

"You little…tch," Kanda was up in a flash and chasing after Allen. _This is stupid,_ but he'd be damned if he let Allen get the better of him.

They played a game of 'catch me if you can' all around the living room, Allen moving quickly out of Kanda's way until he bumped into one of the chairs which threw off his balance. Kanda was on him in a second and pinned him up against the wall.

"Gimme the damn comb," Kanda snarled in Allen's face, hand reaching wildly for Allen's. Allen hid the comb behind his back, switching hands just before Kanda could grab it from him. Kanda moved in closer, pressing Allen harder against the wall as they fought over the comb. Allen was struggled like mad to free himself using his lower body for leverage, twisting and pushing…and their bodies responded to all this close contact in a _most unexpected_ way. They froze for a second at the sensation and then Kanda quickly backed off, their eyes wide with shock as they stared at each other. Allen shoved the comb at Kanda and he snatched it up.

"I'm tired," Kanda mumbled, stalking off to his room and slamming the door behind him.

Allen was too stunned for a moment to move, but then he did the same, softly closing his bedroom door and slumping as he sat down on the bed. Looking down at the bulge in his pants he muttered, "Stop that," because now he really _was_ embarrassed.

 

"Fuck." Kanda glared at the situation in his pants. "Go away," but it didn't. How the fuck did this happen? This was all that idiot's fault for stealing his comb. That idiot that he'd been watching with growing interest over the last couple of months. That idiot that…shit, thinking about that idiot had just made things worse. Kanda let out a long sigh. Resigning himself to his body's betrayal he started to undress. Looks like he'd need to deal with this after all.

He took out the lube from the nightstand drawer and made himself comfortable on the bed. It wasn't like he hadn't done this before. It was just _this time_ he'd have someone to fantasize about while he did it, and began to stroke his growing arousal.

 

Allen had liked looking at Kanda, and he had liked touching Kanda, and the truth finally sank in when he realized what this infatuation with Kanda really meant. _I want him. I want Kanda. But what if he doesn't want me? And now we live together, and this could get really uncomfortable if he doesn't feel the same way. What am I going to do? What the **hell** am I going to do?_

The tightening of his pants seemed to answer at least one question. _Guess I should take care of this first 'cause it's not going away._ He stripped down, staring at his twitching cock. _This is what he does to me._ Lying down he bent his knees and touched himself, slowly stroking, visualizing Kanda standing by the phone in his towel, willing that towel to drop, trying to imagine what Kanda would look like naked. His erection increased, demanding attention, and Allen gave into satisfying himself, wishing it was Kanda touching him, stroking him. A small moan escaped his mouth and his other hand slid down, fingers gently pressing against the tight ring of muscle, gradually pushing inside. His hand slipped over the tip of his cock, spreading the pre-cum.

 _I want Kanda touching me, inside me, fucking me._ What would it feel like? Allen didn't know, but he _wanted_ to know more than ever. He stroked himself harder, fingering himself deeper. He had never been this rough when he did it before, but he had never wanted anything in his life as much as he wanted Kanda right now. Kanda, pressing him up against the wall, his warmth bleeding into Allen as they wrestled for the comb that had started all this. Kanda, who was right down the hall, probably sleeping soundly in his bed. Allen hadn't been in Kanda's room yet. He wondered how big his bed was, imagining the two of them rolling around on it, fucking each other senseless. Another moan escaped. He couldn't hold out much longer. He didn't want to hold out. He needed that release because he hurt. His heart hurt, because he knew what he wanted and didn't know if he could ever have it.

Was this love? He didn't know. It didn't matter, his frustration increasing as his orgasm closed in on him, relentlessly tugging on his cock. "Ah…hah…hah… _oh god, I want you!"_ the words whispered in vain to the object of his desire, and he came so hard he almost cried out but held it in, swallowing it like a bitter pill.

His legs dropped to the bed, his breath slowing and it was a few minutes before he wanted to move. _Shit,_ he'd left the tissues in the bathroom. He covered the mess on his stomach the best he could with his hand and slowly got off the bed. Opening his door he glanced down the hall. The apartment was dark and silent and he quickly moved across the hall to the guest bath, closing the door quietly. Wetting a washcloth he cleaned himself up and stared at his reflection in the mirror for a moment, seeing a person he'd never seen before, his eyes dull as he thought of Kanda rejecting him. He shook his head. _Don't go there. You don't know that'll happen._

He peeked out the door and went back to his room. There was a wet spot on the blanket from where the semen had dripped down his sides. He pulled it off the bed and threw it in the corner. _I'll wash it tomorrow,_ and he climbed under the sheets, rolling on his side, curling up in a ball, just staring at the wall.

_"So you like guys?"_

_"Don't know. Never met one I was attracted to."_

Well, he'd finally met one, and now he had no idea what to do.

 

Never in a million years would Kanda have ever pictured himself doing what he was doing right then, getting off while thinking of Allen. It actually felt good for once. Masturbation had always been a mechanical act for Kanda, just something he used whenever he got too stressed out with the stupidity of the world. He jerked off. He cleaned up the mess. He fell asleep. That's all it had ever been. All he'd ever needed.

But now he needed more. He'd been so stupid. He should've let Allen continue combing his hair. It'd felt so nice and _he_ was the idiot for stopping him. He hadn't known then what made him so uncomfortable. Allen was his friend and that's all he was thinking and it'd made him uneasy. Friends weren't supposed to be touching each other like that and enjoying it, or so he'd thought. He was the one that started it all by touching Allen's hair first, so he really shouldn't have been surprised when Allen reached out to him. But now he wanted that touch again. He wanted Allen.

Allen's fingers playing the piano, making that beautiful music, wanting those fingers playing with his hair instead. Allen's warm smile, and lips that formed that smile, wanting those lips kissing him everywhere. _Heh, I sound like a goddamn romance novel and I don't give a fuck._

 _I wanna fuck him._ Here in this bed, or Allen's bed. It didn't matter. Hell, they could fuck anywhere just so long as he had those fingers and hands and lips on him. He stopped stroking himself just long enough to squeeze some lube on his fingers. He could dry finger himself but a little lube made it easier. Inserting his fingers up his ass he began stroking himself again, imagining Allen's lips on his cock, sucking and licking him. He groaned as he ran his thumb over the tip along the slit, sliding his fingers further in, stretching the opening. Would it feel good, would it hurt if Allen fucked him? Whatever. Kanda would take the pleasure and pain if he could feel Allen moving inside him, hovering over him or maybe from behind. The possibilities were endless as he envisioned Allen, his pale hair plastered to his face with sweat. That soft hair, he wanted to run his hands through it.

His breath was coming faster, panting and sweating, driving himself to the edge. _Fuck…it's never felt this good._ He wanted Allen to make it feel even better. _Unh…fuck…Allen!,_  his heart pounding in his ears as he came, never stopping his stroking until the last wave of his orgasm died down. He was so out of breath, hardly believing how dazed he was.

He heard Allen's door open and the bathroom door close. _Guess I'm not the only one who can't sleep. Wonder if he's got the same problem?_

He reached for the box of tissues and wiped himself off, then went to his bathroom and cleaned up better. Lying down on the side of the bed that was still clean he turned on his side, the moonlight filtering in through the blinds.

It would be perfect if Allen wanted him, but what if he didn't? It wouldn't be right to force it, especially when he remembered how creeped out Allen had been when he'd talked about that asshole that'd come onto him. This could get messy with them living together.

 _What the fuck am I supposed to do now?_ clenching his pillow tightly.

He'd just have to play it by ear and see where it went. When he had Allen pressed up against that wall, just before he'd moved away, he was certain he'd felt a slight bulge in Allen's pants so this might be possible. This would be hard for him, because once he made up his mind about something he went for it with no hesitation, but he'd take his time and wait if it meant he could be with Allen. It had become that important.

For the rest of the night sleep eluded the both of them as they lay in their separate spaces, not realizing just how close they really were.


	7. Chapter 7

The next morning was all kinds of awkward.

Allen had dozed off briefly, and when he opened his eyes and looked at the clock he realized it was still pretty early. It wasn't even light out yet, judging by the dark outside his window. Hearing sounds, he got up and dressed in a t-shirt and sweatpants and left his room. Kanda was in the kitchen and turned when he walked in.

"What're you doing up?" Allen said as he entered the kitchen area. "Thought you didn't leave for work this early."

"Couldn't sleep," Kanda scowled, using the expression to cover for the fact that he was nervous as hell. "Looks like you couldn't either. You look like shit, sprout."

"Same to you," Allen grumbled, hiding his anxiety the best he could. His stomach growled and they both looked at it, and then at each other, and the tension broke a little.

Clearing his throat, Kanda asked, "Want some tea?" putting the kettle on to boil.

"Sure, and maybe some toast, too," and Allen moved past him to the refrigerator and took out the bread. He put two slices in the toaster and pushed down the handle. He stared at the wall, trying to avoid any further eye contact with Kanda, and hummed to himself while he waited for his food. Humming helped him relax and _god knows_ he needed to relax right then.

Because Kanda was standing right next to him. Wearing only sweatpants, and he couldn't stop his eyes from wandering in that direction. _This is as bad as the towel!_ Contrary to what Allen had said, Kanda still looked good, even though his eyes were a little bloodshot. His hair, that damn hair, was hanging straight down his _naked_ back, and Allen could feel stirrings in his groin again. _Please not now!_ Damn the man for teasing him unknowingly.

Kanda noticed Allen sneaking looks and chanced a few of his own. He'd often thought of Allen as unique, almost exotic in appearance, and now Allen was even more pleasing to the eye given all he'd fantasized about last night. He was getting a strange vibe from Allen that was different than the one he'd felt before when Allen was upset. _Could he possibly… Do I dare?_

He moved closer to Allen on the pretense of getting something out of one of the drawers. He leaned in and let his hair fall down over his shoulders, right in front of Allen. _Come on, sprout, tell me what you want._

Kanda's hair was right in front of his face. _He's so close. I want to touch that hair again._ Kanda didn't move. _It's like he's waiting. Like he wants me to…_ Allen looked up into blazing dark eyes, seeing something new there, and he couldn't stop his hand. He took a few strands between his fingers and Kanda didn't pull away. He lifted his other hand and took a few more, pulling on it slightly, pulling Kanda closer, and Kanda didn't resist.

The tea kettle whistled and Kanda turned it off without looking. The toast had popped up long ago and Allen didn't care. They were so close they were sharing the air they breathed... and then their lips crashed together and they were all over each other, everywhere they touched feeling like a jolt of electricity. Their kisses were sloppy and feverish, their mouths burning with the sweet taste of tongues and lips and skin.

"Mmm..." Kanda hummed as he licked his way up and down Allen's neck.

"Yesss," Allen gasped as Kanda's hands found their way under the waistband of his pants.

Kanda kissed him hard on the mouth, his eyes wide open, staring into Allen's. Allen licked Kanda's lips and slipped his tongue into his mouth and Kanda grabbed Allen's ass and lifted him up. Allen hooked his arms around Kanda's neck and his legs tightly around his waist, and Kanda walked them to his bedroom. He dropped Allen lightly on the bed and stood there gazing at him for a moment.

Allen pulled off his shirt and threw it to the side. Kanda dropped his pants and went to his knees, tugging Allen's pants over his hips, pulling them off, and threw them away to join the shirt. Kanda's heart was pounding so hard he was positive Allen could hear it.

"This is much better," Kanda murmured, Allen's erection just inches away from his face, running his hands up Allen's thighs.

"Better than what?" Allen asked, breathing becoming increasingly difficult. He propped himself up on his elbows, barely believing this was happening, and swallowed hard.

 _Better than any of my fantasies,_ but Kanda wouldn't say that now. Maybe someday, but right now this reality was consuming him whole. He answered Allen with a flick of his tongue on the twitching cock in front of him. His hand held it steady and he licked his way up and down the underside of soft, swollen skin. Allen fell back on the bed and moaned at the touch and Kanda's mouth reached the top and took Allen in, just a bit, and Allen gasped as Kanda's tongue ran across the slit. He let out a small cry and a "Kanda, please…"

Kanda looked at him as he gently sucked on the tip, taking more of it in, but not all the way. He backed off and held it firmly in his hand, stroking it a little. Allen's eyes were pleading, so Kanda told him to scoot up the bed. Allen did and Kanda moved with him, reaching in the drawer of his nightstand to pull out the lube.

Allen looked at it with a puzzled expression. "Kanda, why do you have…"

"It's not what you think. I just use it sometimes when I jerk off. This is a first for me, too, so it's probably gonna be all clumsy and shit."

Allen smiled, "Clumsy's okay," and Kanda chuckled a little. He put some lube on his fingers, spreading it around with his thumb. Allen bent his knees and Kanda touched Allen lightly, coaxing the tense muscles to loosen up, working his way inside. The muscles tightened and Kanda looked at Allen.

"Breathe," Kanda offered, and Allen realized he'd been holding his breath. He let it out and Kanda slid his finger in, moving it constantly to keep the muscles from contracting again.

Allen gasped and pushed as Kanda added another finger. Allen moved closer, wanting it deeper. Kanda was getting incredibly turned on watching Allen and stretched the opening more. He wrapped his hand around Allen's cock and began to stroke him.

"No…don't," Allen moaned.

"No?" Kanda looked at him, slightly confused.

"Don't want to come just yet...if I can help it."

Kanda took Allen's meaning and let go of him. He continued to finger him until he felt it was enough. He couldn't wait any longer. With one last scissor of his fingers he pulled out and coated his cock liberally with lube, spreading some more over Allen's opening and lined himself up.

Allen lifted his legs and Kanda grasped them and pushed them up and began to slide inside Allen. Allen immediately clamped down on his cock and Kanda groaned and pulled out, only to push right back in, craving more of that tight warmth. Allen moaned and clutched the sheets and Kanda leaned over him, moving further inside with each thrust, gaining momentum. Allen lifted his arms, pulling Kanda to him and kissed him furiously as Kanda fucked him harder, hitting a spot inside Allen that made him arch his back and dig his heels in. Allen broke the kiss and grit his teeth when Kanda found it again as he thrust faster into him. Allen buried his face in the crook of his neck, breathing hard, his cries muffled by Kanda's hair. They rocked back and forth, their motions uncontrolled and frenzied, trying to find a rhythm, and Kanda was so close to losing it. He pulled Allen off the bed into his arms, an intense wave building and he gave into it and slammed into Allen, filling him until it was dripping all over the bed.

They fell down, Kanda shuddering from his climax, Allen waiting until Kanda had calmed. Kanda pulled out and rolled over next to Allen, eyes glazed over. Allen slowly turned on his side, wincing a bit from the stiffness in his lower back and stretched his legs out. He ran his hand over Kanda's chest, feeling the heartbeat gradually returning to normal, but Allen's heart was racing as he looked over the naked body next to him. He propped himself up on his elbow, eyes glowing with desire.

Kanda just chuckled. "You look like you wanna eat me up."

"Absolutely," Allen whispered hoarsely.

Kanda looked down at Allen's full erection and murmured, "Surprised you didn't come."

"Took everything I had not to. My turn now," he rasped and moved in closer, his hand reaching around Kanda's waist. The man was boneless and sated and Allen flipped him onto his stomach with ease, situating himself between Kanda's legs, ignoring the discomfort in his back. He picked up the lube, rubbed some on his fingers and more on Kanda.

Kanda slowly got up on his knees, his face pressed into the pillow, and moaned as Allen's finger entered him, probing him, spreading him as he slipped in another. Kanda moved back and Allen moved forward, his cock throbbing against hot flesh. Allen grasped it and rubbed it on the opening with his fingers still inside. Kanda moaned again.

"C'mon, Allen," he hissed, "fuck me."

Allen pulled his fingers out and covered his cock thoroughly in lube, wanting this, needing this as much as Kanda. His fantasy was right before him, asking to be taken. This was so much more than he'd ever dreamed possible and he moved into place and let himself go, taut heat compressing around him.

Kanda groaned into the pillow, his hands gripping it tightly as Allen took him, hands on his hips, body flush against him with every thrust. Allen drove himself deeper, searching every time for that same spot in Kanda, finally succeeding when Kanda let out a choked cry. He adjusted his thrusts to hit it again and Kanda rammed himself back on Allen, demanding more. Allen gave it to him until he could barely breathe, panting as fast as he was moving, his need growing until it became unbearable, and he came with a force so strong his legs almost caved on him, holding onto Kanda's hips to steady himself as he let it all out until there was no more.

Allen collapsed on Kanda's back and Kanda fell on the bed. They flopped on their sides, Allen still inside Kanda, pulling out slowly. Kanda turned over and pushed Allen's damp hair off his forehead, kissing the warm, wet skin. He kissed the tip of his nose and then his lips briefly before pulling Allen in. Allen draped an arm and a leg over Kanda and snuggled into him. They were a happy, sweaty mess.

"So what do we call this?" Allen pondered quietly. "Are we boyfriends? Lovers?"

"Why do we have to call it anything? It just is. I want _you._ " Allen's eyes flashed. "You want _me._ Fuck the world and its fucking labels."

"I'd rather you fuck me instead," Allen said, grinning.

"Demanding little thing, aren't you?" Kanda chuckled.

The room had gradually lightened with the coming of dawn. "Don't you have to go to work?" Allen murmured into Kanda's chest.

"Think I'll call in sick. Feel like I got a fever," Kanda said, smirking. "Ugh, this bed's a wreck. We should get cleaned up, too."

"Yeah, let's," Allen agreed, happy that he'd have Kanda all to himself all day. He picked up the lube and dangled it in front of Kanda with a wicked gleam in his eye, "and then we can move to my bed."

Kanda laughed as they got off the bed and stumbled to the bathroom. "I had a feeling living with you would be interesting."


	8. Chapter 8

Now that they knew where they stood with each other they would shake their heads and wonder why it'd taken as long as it did for them to realize how they felt. They joked about it constantly, trying to figure out which of them was the bigger idiot, but in the end they admitted they both were.

Their lives were pretty much the same, just more fulfilling, and sex played a part in that. They hadn't received any complaints from their neighbors about the 'noise' coming from their apartment so they figured the walls really _were_ thick in this building, or their neighbors must be either deaf or didn't give a shit.

But it wasn't just the sex. The comfort they derived from each other grew deeper by the day, and when they had to be apart for whatever reason it was easier to bear, just knowing that they no longer lived alone.

 

"So this Anita. She wants to be your manager, right?"

They were sitting on the balcony in the early evening. The smell of rain was in the air and thunder rumbled off in the distance. A storm was approaching, but at least it made for a nice breeze on a hot summer night.

"Yeah," Allen answered, his head resting on Kanda's shoulder. The balcony was the one place in the apartment where they _hadn't_ explored their new relationship, seeing as how it was in full view of the parking lot and park beyond. Otherwise they'd have made good use of it, too. "She's been telling people about me, and the jobs I've gotten were because of her referrals. She's quite a smart businesswoman and knows how the system works."

"Then why don't you take her up on it? I don't know that much about the music business, but having someone with connections seems like a good thing."

"The thing is, if I did go solo it would mean I'd be in the public eye, not just behind the scenes like I have been, and people want to know more about you the more visible you are. It would mean they'd be curious about you, too."

"I've got nothing to hide."

"Neither have I, but they can be rather persistent and rude in their methods at times."

"If they get in my face I'll just kick their ass."

"Yeah, I know you would," Allen chuckled.

Kanda brushed him off with a wave of his hand. "That's not important right now. You need to get your career on track. Working part-time was supposed to give you more time for your music, but I haven't heard that much coming out of you lately."

Clouds were moving rapidly as the wind picked up and a few drops of rain began to fall. Kanda dropped his feet from the railing and Allen sat up. Lightning flashed across the sky and Allen said, "Guess we should go in."

"Just stop putting this off and get your act together," Kanda muttered as he slid the door open.

"Yeah, I've been slacking off lately. Hmm, wonder why that is?" Allen grinned as he followed Kanda back inside.

"Don't try to blame this on me," Kanda grumped as they went to the kitchen to fix dinner.

"But you can be so distracting," Allen purred as he wrapped his arms around Kanda from behind.

"Hmph…," but he smiled in spite of himself and mumbled, "So can _you_ …," as he pulled away from Allen and shoved a pot at him. "Make yourself useful and fill this up." Allen just chuckled and nudged Kanda away from the sink with his hip.

 

Even though their lives seemed to be moving smoothly along, Allen's self-imposed six-month deadline was right around the corner, and the part-time jobs he was taking to fill in the gaps between session requests were becoming problematic. His employers were none too keen as he tried to juggle his schedules around when he needed to be out of town and he was forced to quit more often than not. And then the offers for studio work dwindled when he wasn't readily available because of the part-time jobs.

It was wearing him out and it showed, and Kanda was getting increasingly pissed by the day because of it. It didn't help that it was the rainy season. Kanda couldn't do much at his landscaping job when it was raining every day, and it made him even more testy. So when Allen dragged himself home late one night after closing up at the fast-food place he was currently working at things came to a head. Allen had just enough time to get his shoes off before Kanda lit into him.

"What the _fuck,_ Allen?!"

"What's your damage?" Allen snapped back at him, pushing past Kanda into the living room.

"It's not _my_ damage. You look like shit." Kanda grabbed Allen's arm and whirled him around to face him.

"I'm too tired for this," Allen narrowed his eyes.

"That's just it. You can barely keep your eyes open. You're exhausted all the time, and you can't even get it up properly half the time."

Allen glared at him and yanked his arm free. He opened his mouth, readying a retort, but Kanda held his hand up.

"No. You're gonna shut up and listen to me. I haven't heard a single bit of music from you in weeks. It's like you're all dried up inside and I can't stand to see you wasting away like this. Just quit the damn jobs and spend some time with your piano because it misses you." He lowered the volume of his voice and added, "and I miss hearing you play."

Allen sighed and ran his hand through his hair. "I don't know what to do anymore. I feel like hell. I can't concentrate, and my inspiration's just deserted me. But I need to work. I need to pull my own weight. It's not fair to dump it all on you."

"Then dump it on me. I don't mind. You're trying to do too much and not getting anywhere. I can easily take care of the bills, so why not let me take care of _you_ for a while, too." He reached out his hand to take Allen's, but Allen pulled away.

"I need some time," and he walked away to his room and shut the door.

Kanda sighed and sat on the sofa, picking up a book from the coffee table. He opened it and just stared at the pages, unable to focus, so he leaned his head back and closed his eyes. He wasn't sure how much time had passed when he heard the sounds of the piano. He opened his eyes and looked towards Allen's room and smiled. "About damn time, sprout," and tried focusing again on the book still open in his lap.

Allen eventually came out of his room and walked briskly over to Kanda. His hands were shaking as he took the book from him and dropped it on the sofa. Taking Kanda's hand in his he pulled him with him back to his room, put his hands on Kanda's shoulders and pushed him down to sit on the bed. Kanda was staring at him the whole time, afraid to break the silence. Allen sat down at the piano, his hands still shaking as he held them over the keys. He took a deep breath, and then he began to play the most beautiful song Kanda had ever heard.

It was a new piece, and it seemed like Allen was just making it up on the spot which, in fact, he was. It came pouring out of him in an inspirational rush, infused with so much emotion that tears welled up in Kanda's eyes, and he was unaware of that or anything else until Allen was kneeling before him, his hands cupping Kanda's face.

"That song…" Kanda's voice was rough with emotion.

"It's for you. _Only_ for you," Allen whispered and kissed him, soft and lingering.

Kanda pulled him into his arms and said quietly, "It'll be okay," gently rocking them back and forth and Allen sank into the soothing motion. They moved onto the bed and curled around each other, continuing to utter small reassurances until they fell asleep, and in the morning Allen called Anita.

 

"I'm happy you decided to take me up on my offer," Anita said as Allen showed her into the apartment. Mahoja, her ever present shadow, was right behind them.

"I had a little encouragement," Allen said as they entered the living room.

"More like a boot up the ass," Kanda added as he approached and took Anita's outstretched hand.

"Nice to meet you, Kanda, and this is Mahoja, my cohort in crime," indicating the woman standing next to her.

"Pleasure," Mahoja said as she shook hands with Kanda. There was silence for a moment as they stood, staring intently, sizing one another up, until Mahoja broke into a large grin and Kanda smirked and let go of the big woman's hand.

"Well, looks like they've bonded," Anita commented and Allen chuckled.

"This building just installed a gym in the basement. I haven't checked it out yet. Interested?" Kanda asked.

Mahoja looked at Anita with childlike hope and Anita laughed lightly. "You two go on. We'll just be talking boring business here."

Mahoja's grin grew even larger and she grabbed Kanda by the arm, pulling him to the door.

"Hey, slow down!" Kanda shook his head as he was dragged along.

Anita's eyes followed them until they left. "Will he be alright? Mahoja can be rather enthusiastic at times."

"Don't worry about Kanda. He can take care of himself," Allen grinned as they went to the table and sat down.

"I'll take your word for it. Now then," and she laid out the necessary paperwork on the table. She explained in detail the terms of the contract, indicating where Allen should sign, and when they were finished she asked, "Any questions?"

"Up to now I've only been working in the background, and with this I'll be more up front. You know about Kanda and me, right?"

"Of course. You don't want anyone else to know?"

"It's not so much that. I just want to keep my professional and personal life separate. What I have with him is too important to me and I'd hate for him to be bothered unnecessarily. And he's not exactly a people person. It would get messy if people got too nosy," Allen said, chuckling lightly.

"I understand," Anita said, laughing along with him, "and I'll do my best to keep them out of your hair. It's only natural to be nervous about that, but you just concentrate on the music and let me take care of the rest."

"Then I'll leave it up to you," Allen said, feeling relieved as Kanda and Mahoja came back in.

"How about we celebrate then? My treat," and she got up from the table.

Kanda looked at her skeptically. "You sure you wanna do that? You know how much he eats," smirking as Allen shot him a look.

"I'm fully aware of our gluttonous friend," Anita said, smiling as they made to leave.

"Then let's get going!" and Allen was already heading for the door with the others following in his wake.

 

Allen's career slowly, but steadily, developed with Kanda's support and Anita's diligence. He reached new depths of creativity, and it energized him and all those around him. Kanda was very pleased with this, and Allen worked from home as much as possible so he could be with him before he had to go to the studio to record the final results.

Anita worked the other end, promoting and booking him small shows, and when it all came together Allen was finally able to show off just how talented he really was.


	9. Chapter 9

Several years later Kanda was standing offstage watching as Allen finished up his show to a packed theater. Allen had wanted his last performance of the tour to be some place close to home and Anita, being the perfect manager she was, had made sure that request was granted.

It was a smaller venue, seating hundreds instead of thousands of people, but Allen preferred this kind of place more than a large hall. He liked the intimate setting, feeling more of a connection with his audience and he ended the set to a standing ovation. It had always been Allen's dream to play a grand piano in concert and he ran a hand lovingly over the keys. He stood to take his bows and left the stage, eyes bright and beaming as he walked right into Kanda's waiting arms.

"You're amazing," Kanda said, his voice low and comforting. He pulled Allen in, kissing the top of his head and tilted his face up a little to press his lips firmly against Allen's. Allen melted into Kanda's embrace, all sounds of the applause dissolving into the warmth of the man holding him in his arms. After what felt like an eternity they sensed a presence nearby.

"I don't mean to interrupt, but some time in the next century would be good for an encore, Allen."

He reluctantly broke the kiss and turned his head towards his manager. "Sure, Anita," face flushed from the heady high he was experiencing.

Anita chuckled lightly. "Oh, and Mahoja? Seems like some people are trying to sneak backstage. Could you take care of that please, and try to be gentle. Don't want anyone to leave the show with a bad taste in their mouth."

Mahoja grinned widely and cracked her knuckles. "Consider it done," and she headed off in search of the culprits.

Allen leaned into Kanda and pressed a quick kiss to his lips. "Be right back," he smiled and stepped away.

"Take your time. I'm not going anywhere," Kanda assured him with a grin. He stood next to Anita as they watched Allen return to the stage. The applause increased in volume as he smiled and bowed once again and took his seat at the piano. When he began to play a silence fell, Allen's melody casting its spell.

 _This song…_ Kanda's heart skipped a beat.

"Anita…"

"Hmm?"

"Has he…does he play this in concert?"

"I've been to all his shows and I've never heard it before. It's beautiful."

Allen looked across the stage, directly at Kanda, and smiled. He closed his eyes and continued playing. That look wasn't lost on either of them.

"Oh…so that's why," Anita observed quietly, glancing over at Kanda who was standing stock still, all his attention on the pianist.

Allen brought the song to its end, only to segue into something a little more lively. The audience stirred out of its reverie, recognition on their faces at the familiar tune, and Allen carried them along to a sweet, summer place. They rose to their feet as one as the song came to a close and he turned on his seat to face them, his eyes a little misty with emotion, before he rose and bowed to the bravos and whistles.

As Allen was taking his bows Anita said, "You know, he talks about you all the time."

Kanda came back to reality and raised an eyebrow. "Nothing good I expect," smirking at her.

"On the contrary," she smiled conspiratorially at him. "I'll give you a call sometime and we can talk."

"I look forward to it," Kanda grinned as Allen took his leave of the stage, practically floating as he walked, and he latched onto Kanda's arm.

"Am I done?" Allen asked his manager.

"You certainly are, and you were wonderful as always. Go on home, Allen. You deserve it." She gave him a quick peck on the cheek. "I'd best go find Mahoja."

"Thanks Anita, and tell Mahoja thanks for everything, too." Allen pulled Kanda with him, heading for the exit. They walked outside and Allen was free, happy to finally be going home. He linked his arm in Kanda's and they made their way to the car.

 

Back in their apartment they were resting on the bed after the show. They could live anywhere they wanted, but Allen couldn't imagine any place better than this. This place, with a myriad of good memories, all of them because of the man currently lying beside him, and he held them close to his heart just like he held Kanda now.

"Hey, remember that guy that came onto me, seems like ages ago now?"

"Yeah, what about him?"

"Well, Anita was at a party recently and he was there. She overheard him talking about how he knew me when, and how he always knew I'd make something of myself. You know, the usual bullshit."

"That bastard, I'm gonna..."

"I can think of better ways for you to expend your energy."

"Oh? Like what?" a gleam in his eye.

"Like…you know," pulling Kanda's head down onto his chest.

"Mmm…I'm fine with that, too."

"But it'll have to wait. We've gotta be at Tiedoll's in an hour for dinner."

"Plenty of time," Kanda snuggled closer.

"Heh…but really, you know I like to take my time with that," running his fingers through dark silk.

"Time well spent, too." Kanda sighed. "Fine, later then, but you'll have to indulge me."

"Whatever you want," Allen kissed the top of his head. "Whatever you want," he whispered into the soft hair of his lover.

 

Warm lips and a wet tongue sliding up his inner thigh and Allen moaned into the darkness of their bedroom. _"Whatever you want"_ was what he'd promised and Allen let Kanda do as he pleased.

"I missed you so much," Allen said breathily, and Kanda glanced up at him through half-lidded eyes. Moving his hands lightly up Allen's sides into the soft, pale hair he kissed him with a slow passion. Allen slid his tongue over Kanda's lips and Kanda captured that tongue with his mouth and sucked on it suggestively, a hand wrapping around Allen's hardening shaft, pumping slowly. His other hand slipped under Allen, moving downwards. Allen thrust himself up into Kanda's hand and gasped softly when he felt fingers carefully working into him, curling and brushing against his prostate. Allen reflexively thrust again into Kanda's hand, pulse increasing with every stroke and teasing touch.

He groaned with pleasure as Kanda stimulated him, his senses tingling from his lover's incessant attentions. Kanda licked a trail down Allen's neck to his nipple, taking the bud in his mouth, swirling his tongue around it until it was just as hard as Allen's cock and slid his tongue back up to Allen's ear. "I'm gonna ride you," his voice so smooth and sultry it quickened Allen's heartbeat.

Kanda moved on top, positioning Allen's cock at his entrance and slowly, ever so slowly, lowered himself down. Allen's chest was heaving as Kanda's muscles contracted around his cock as he moved up and down. Kanda stroked himself just as slowly as he moved, leaning over Allen, warm breaths by his ear. "Want all of you...in me," and he took Allen in all the way, gasping as it rubbed against his prostate.

Allen was falling apart watching Kanda moving over him in what seemed like slow motion. He reached his hands up to touch his face and Kanda gazed down at him. Kanda's eyes, his lips, his hair, his body, his everything. Kanda was everything to Allen. How he'd missed his lover and Allen brought their lips together with ever mounting desire.

Kanda kissed him deeply, as deeply as he was taking him in, moving faster now, pressing Allen into the bed, his stroking more insistent and ragged. Sweat was coating their skin as Allen thrust up and Kanda dropped down, their motions so fluid and natural. Allen knew just how to move, just where to hit to make Kanda clench his teeth and bite down on Allen's lip. Kanda buried his face in Allen's neck, sucking hard on the skin. He was shaking as he milked his cock to the edge and warm semen flowed over his hand, spreading out over Allen.

But he didn't stop there, forcing his trembling legs to continue to move. Allen's hands clutched at Kanda's hair, bucking his hips up into Kanda over and over as the man came down on him. Moaning heavily, his mind was all hazy as Kanda was kissing him again, barely comprehending what Kanda was saying.

"Stay with me, Allen. Don't leave again," Kanda breathed into Allen's mouth, fully aware of how selfish this request was, wanting to keep him here forever. Allen's tongue delved as deep as his cock and Kanda clung to him tightly, riding Allen with renewed vigor to tip his lover over the brink into the madness and bliss of his orgasm. Allen cried out Kanda's name when he came, and filled him with a warmth Kanda had been craving for so long.

Neither of them moved much. A light touch, a kiss, a caress, a whisper, until they gradually surfaced back to sanity. Kanda wiped them off and they climbed under the covers, so close and comfortable.

"You're cruel," Allen said with a mock pout.

"How so?"

"Saying something like that while you're driving me crazy."

"Not even sorry," nuzzling into Allen's neck.

"I'll stay here. I'll figure something out."

"You know that's not realistic," Kanda pulled back, looking into those determined eyes, "but I think I'll just take some time off and go with you next time."

Allen's eyes sparkled and he pulled Kanda down. "I couldn't ask for more, now that both of my dreams have come true."

"Both?"

"I've always dreamt of playing a grand piano on a proper stage."

"And the other?"

"It was something I didn't even know I wanted until I met you again."

"Heh…then that makes two of us," and they disappeared under the blankets into their own little world.

 

It was warm, but not like the stifling heat of summer, and there was a pleasant breeze blowing. Allen knelt in front of the gravesite with Kanda beside him, decorating it with a riot of wildflowers. Satisfied with the results they stood, and Allen looked up at the clear, blue sky. So different than that day he'd met Kanda again.

"I'm sorry it's taken us so long getting back, Mana. Things have been really busy lately, but I know that's no excuse. I hope you can hear me wherever you are now, because I just want you to know how happy I am."

They stood for a little while in that quiet place as the sun began to dip below the trees. Kanda wrapped his arm around Allen's waist and pulled him close. "Time to go home," he said quietly.

Allen leaned into him and whispered to the sky, "I'm not cold anymore, Mana. It's good to be alive," and they turned and walked to the car with fingers entwined and their steps light and easy.


End file.
